A downer of a day

There are days when motherhood seems like such a beating. Today was one of those days.

It started off benign enough--breakfast at Gran and Gramps' place in San Antonio, capping off a visit that included a day at Seaworld with friends and exploring the riverwalk. Visiting Mamaw and Papaw at their house for a bit before loading up and heading home to Killeen. But then things started going wrong.

Aubrey refused to nap in the car, instead babbling constantly and acting like someone had shot her up with a syringe of straight caffeine. Then Aiden got car sick and puked all over himself, the car seat, and the floor of the van, with no notice or warning. Of course, we were in the middle of nowhere and had to try to pull over and clean the mess up with a few paper towels and a pack of baby wipes. After we wiped and scraped and tried to clean up what we could, we had to rush the rest of the way home in a puke-scented car and try to arrive in time to pick-up the dogs before the kennel closed at 5. We arrived just in time--and were then informed that our female dog, Freckles, had gone into heat, and the workers weren't sure if our male puppy got to her before they discovered it. Great.

We got home about 20 minutes later, and when I unbuckled Aubrey, I discovered that she was burning up. Absolutely scorching hot.  And I noticed what appeared to be a mosquito bite welling up on her ankle. She'd been mildly sick since Thursday, while we were at Seaworld she developed a low-grade fever and cough and snotty nose, but no fevers like this. I took her temp--104.1. I quickly gave her Tylenol and watched in horror/amazement as the "mosquito bite" on her ankle became 3, then 5, then 10, that spread up her legs and trunk. Within minutes, the bumps were multiplying, with the earlier ones disappearing as fast as new ones were appearing. I called the nurse advice line and they told me to head to the ER immediately, in case this was a severe allergic reaction. We left Aiden with a neighbor and headed out.

After chest x-rays and exams, they ruled out the scary stuff and determined that it was a virus and viral urticaria (hives) and sent us home to watch and wait for her to get better. Once home, we discovered Aiden had been up to mischief while we were gone, throwing rocks with another neighbor boy and denting his mom's car. The other mom was livid and marched Aiden home, unleashing her anger on the friend that I'd left Aiden in the care of--meaning I now have 2 neighbors/friends who aren't fond of my son right now. I grounded Aiden, took away priveledges and sent him up to bed.

Then I took Aubrey up to tuck her in. She threw a huge tantrum, kicking me in the stomach and hitting me repeatedly. I finally got her in bed and went in to tuck Aiden in. He's sullen, and when I asked him what's going on--he's been grouchy and snippy and short-tempered for days--he broke down into a bawling, sobbing mess, begging me to move us back to Wylie and all his old friends. He said he hates how everything changes: we moved away from his friends, he made friends here that have moved away, daddy is leaving, etc. We talked and I tried to comfort him as much as I could, but then he asked me: "What happens to me if you and daddy both die? I'd be all alone!" So there I was, trying to comfort a child whose daddy is heading off to war about his biggest fears, death and dying and being left alone, and all the time thinking, "Six year olds shouldn't have to worry about these things!"

So tonight, I am ready for bed. Ready to close my eyes and sleep away the day, and hoping that tomorrow will be a better day.

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